I am a woman and you are a man and I have always known it. If you love me, tell me so. Don’t approach me as you would an enemy. I am on your side and have always been. We have survived, and we may just be able to teach the world a lesson.
‑‑ Fran Sanders

We women and men, we’re a team. When one is winning, both of us are winning; when one is down, the other’s down, too. When one of us is hurt, we both weep; and when one of us is happy, both of us are lifted up. We complement each other, providing for one another that which the other needs. We are yin and yang, fire and water, noun and verb. We are the unity of opposites, balancing, supplementing, and completing one another. We are as the ancient philosopher Heraclitus mused, “The road up and the road down are the same thing.”

But as good as all that sounds, sometimes the hardest thing to do is see man and woman as bonafide partners making the world spin, twist, and turn together.

It’s extremely hard when we treat each other as objects – sexual objects, money objects – and not as humans with feelings. It’s even more difficult to fathom men and women as collaborators in the churning of life when we entertain and encourage misogyny and misandry. When the messages we give and receive define men as “dogs” and women as “female dogs,” how easy is it to consider that man or that woman your teammate?

At every moment and opportunity, our task as lovers of one another should be to confront and refute the negativity, pessimism, and contemptuousness that keep us women and men from embracing each another and our differences, regardless of our personal and painful experiences. Whoa, that’s a mouthful! Here it is again: At every moment and opportunity, our task as lovers of one another should be to confront and refute the negativity, pessimism, and contemptuousness that keep us women and men from embracing each another and our differences, regardless of our personal and painful experiences.

When we don’t challenge the derision, we perpetuate the myths, stereotypes, lies, and deceit, and, of course, never move to the next level. We never become one, never become whole. We remain disconnected, disjointed, and never strong enough to elevate ourselves or unite our families and community.

Imagine who we would be if we could honor one another; respect, consider, and cover one another. Imagine what our meeting would be if we realized we’re on the same road and each day slowed up to greet, kiss, and hug each other as we walked about the road. Imagine that our meeting in the middle of the road tilted the world back into perfect balance.

Sadiqqa © 2007