Don’t ask for a light load, but rather ask for a strong back.-- Author Unknown
Remind yourself of all the times you believed the tasks ahead of you were too difficult or too demanding. What did you do? Did you give up and find something easier to tackle? Did you whine, cry, and complain until someone came to your aid and did the tasks for you? Did you do the tasks any kind of way just to get them done and then watch them turn out in a way that wasn’t so great or at least less than the best? Or did you just dig in until you got the missions accomplished?
Remind yourself of the times you dug in and worked hard and long to get a thing done. What’d you do? When you took the task apart a little at a time, did you stare the challenge in its face and declare yourself the conqueror – whether you believed it or not? Did you find your guts and chutzpah then slowly but certainly expand your brain power, temperament, outlook, and approach to get the job done? Did you focus your entire energies on the job and commit your mind and muscles to fully cooperate as you pulled off the task? The more intensive the task became, did you keep employing inward motivation and resolve, and when the task didn’t work just right the first time, did you push through surrender and discover new reserves of patience and resiliency tucked beside the alcoves of your wit and right below the bay of your heart? Did you look up and become encouraged as you saw the light at the end of the tunnel, your supporters cheering you on, and satisfaction approaching?
Did you pat yourself on the back when you got the thing done? Did you look different? Did you feel stronger, more powerful? Did you take that same look and feel on to the next task and get it done with the identical spirit, doggedness, courage, and gusto you mustered with your previous task? Did you have to dig deeper to find greater stockpiles of muscle and hustle? Did you find it easier to search your wellsprings for what you needed? When your territory was enlarged and your efforts paid off, did you celebrate your accomplishment and lovingly reward yourself with admiration?
The truth be told, the load doesn’t really ever get lighter, and the mess is usually always somewhere near. But you’ve built up enough ingenuity, agency, and willpower to get through it like the champ you are. Keep reminding yourself of that.
Of course, in retrospect, if you want to really assess and revere how far you’ve come, think of the situations in which you did throw in the towel, whine really loudly, and do the thing just any old way just to get it done. Yeah, you had your reasons for doing such – some valid, others shady. But now think on all the skill sets you’ve developed since that time. You’re stronger, wiser, sharper, more ambitious, and especially buoyant these days. Heck, if you wanted to, you could go back and handle all that stuff now. But what’s the point in going back when there’s so much more ahead to tackle? You didn’t know then what you know now, you weren’t supposed to, and who the hell’s keeping track anyway?
Take your load, take it slow, keep digging and building your backbone for the next load for a strong back makes for greater strides.
Sadiqqa © 2008
Jul 7, 2008
Jul 2, 2008
Given all the facts cited above and according to all psychological theory, black women in America should have the highest rate of suicide; yet we press on and live on. We make up seventy percent of our congregations on our churches. We are the ones holding our homes together.
-- Audrey F. Bronson, “Sister to Sister”
Enough said? Some of us would think so. Even the “Thought...,” thought so some few years ago, bless its heart.
But let’s give credit to the other half of the African American equation. Brothas, you are awesome, too!
Too often, when lifting Black women and lauding our hard earned accomplishments, we fail to mention Black men optimistically. Every Black man is not a playa, a dead beat, or a moocher. There are many who hold women in the highest esteem. There are many who walk with us and hold us up when our walk becomes too overwhelming or frightening. There are Black men who would give their lives just to see us, our children, and community remain unharmed and empowered. You know these men.
These are the Black men who stay and endure the hardships with us so that we don’t commit suicide or homicide. These are the Brothas who work hard to make life happen as positively and fruitfully as they can despite the many obstacles and interferences stacked against them and us. These are the men who make us laugh after a good cry, smile through the pain, and feel at ease when all hell has broken loose and there’s no visible light at the end of the tunnel. You know these men.
These are the Black men who would never think of committing acts of violence against us, even when we’ve pulled the last straw and thrown the first blow. These are the men who love us even when we find it hard to love ourselves; the Black men who love our children as fathers even though they aren’t theirs; the Brothas who hold family in its rightful place; and the Brothas who are conscious and work diligently to fulfill the needs in our families, the community, and across the world. You do know these men.
If you aren’t sure, look around you. You see that Brotha over there taking care of his body and mind, who visits his doctor for regular check-ups, guidance, and information? What about that Brotha over there who’s happily pushing his grandson on the swing? Look at that Black man there holding the hand of that beautiful woman with the relaxed and peaceful expression on her face. And what about that Black man over there who showed up for work today, on time, ready to be productive and accountable? You see that one there, speaking his heart and acting on God’s will to make useful change in the world? And check out that Black man there, the one next to you in the pew praising the Creator. See? Yeah, you know them.
A summary of the statistics indicate that Black men have it rough too, right? Let’s never forget or get so caught up in our fight that we forget to laud Brothas and their fight too. Our challenges are huge is big and so are theirs. Keep at the forefront the Fight in its entirety.
Sadiqqa © 2008
-- Audrey F. Bronson, “Sister to Sister”
Enough said? Some of us would think so. Even the “Thought...,” thought so some few years ago, bless its heart.
But let’s give credit to the other half of the African American equation. Brothas, you are awesome, too!
Too often, when lifting Black women and lauding our hard earned accomplishments, we fail to mention Black men optimistically. Every Black man is not a playa, a dead beat, or a moocher. There are many who hold women in the highest esteem. There are many who walk with us and hold us up when our walk becomes too overwhelming or frightening. There are Black men who would give their lives just to see us, our children, and community remain unharmed and empowered. You know these men.
These are the Black men who stay and endure the hardships with us so that we don’t commit suicide or homicide. These are the Brothas who work hard to make life happen as positively and fruitfully as they can despite the many obstacles and interferences stacked against them and us. These are the men who make us laugh after a good cry, smile through the pain, and feel at ease when all hell has broken loose and there’s no visible light at the end of the tunnel. You know these men.
These are the Black men who would never think of committing acts of violence against us, even when we’ve pulled the last straw and thrown the first blow. These are the men who love us even when we find it hard to love ourselves; the Black men who love our children as fathers even though they aren’t theirs; the Brothas who hold family in its rightful place; and the Brothas who are conscious and work diligently to fulfill the needs in our families, the community, and across the world. You do know these men.
If you aren’t sure, look around you. You see that Brotha over there taking care of his body and mind, who visits his doctor for regular check-ups, guidance, and information? What about that Brotha over there who’s happily pushing his grandson on the swing? Look at that Black man there holding the hand of that beautiful woman with the relaxed and peaceful expression on her face. And what about that Black man over there who showed up for work today, on time, ready to be productive and accountable? You see that one there, speaking his heart and acting on God’s will to make useful change in the world? And check out that Black man there, the one next to you in the pew praising the Creator. See? Yeah, you know them.
A summary of the statistics indicate that Black men have it rough too, right? Let’s never forget or get so caught up in our fight that we forget to laud Brothas and their fight too. Our challenges are huge is big and so are theirs. Keep at the forefront the Fight in its entirety.
Sadiqqa © 2008
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